It's been one week since i'm out of anti-depressives. Wich sucks.
I've been taking them for four years now, and they've became an inportant part of my life(yay :D, no.)
at first, it was such a RUSH of many stuff that can make me exited, that i can't even explain it well. But as the time goes by, you get used to it, and you just feel balanced(in my case, i take them for depression and bi-polar transtorn.
the crap about the anti-depressives, is that you can't stop taking them all of sudden, specially, if you have been taking them for so long.I mean, it's not impossible, it's just hard.
But i don't intend to stop taking AD or anything. It's just that my doctor turned out to be a human being and went on vacation(can you imagine that? i know!!) for one month. I kinda saw it comming, but i thought it wouldn't be that bad.
Turns out that i'm on abstinence crisis, that's the term my doctor(too bad for him for giving me his personal number :D)used when we talked about it yesterday. First, you feel nauseous, about one day or two, then you get teribly down with your humor, then you get extremelly stressful, wich in my case unlocks two problems: constant ups and downs of humor, and nervous gastritis(family problem), wich means i basically can't eat without feeling sick.
at first i thought "oh, okay, i think i can handle it, it's not like it's gonna be forever". Of course i didn't handle it, otherwise i wouldn't be making a fucking POST on by blog about it. I used to deal with my issues by writting about it. My psychologist said it's a very good way to face problems, but since i starded taking pills i just don't feel the need to write about everything i feel now and then, in fact, it starded to make me feel enbarassed, so i stopped.
One week without pills, and here i am again talking worthless shit on my blog(weee).
But the history ends well(i guess), because my parents kinda noticed my reaction this week after i suddenly stopped talking and eating and started(once again) to sleep all day and watch the night pass trhough my eyes while i can't sleep. So they(with the permission from my doctor by telephone, haha) went to another doctor(who is a friend of my doctor and [s]is a responsable and sensible person[/s] is not on vacation) and got me a prescription for my pills. I already took one, but the effect starts only tomorrow, said my doctor.
I hope i start to feel good,because i don't want to feel like this during my intire fucking vacation.
bye.
